Grandma's story
The other day my grandma told my mother and I a story of a God experience she had from years ago. She and my grandpa were at a Marriage Encounter weekend that had taken a long time for her to get to. She said it took almost 3 years to be able to go because of my grandpa's work schedule was so erratic. As they got to the retreat she began to experience excruciating pain from an ovarian cyst. Apparently she got these occasionally back then and they were completely debilitating for her. Later that night as she was laying in agony she said the finally snapped and lashed at God saying "I'm here for this retreat, I know You want us to come to it. Why are You letting me be in pain?! I'm so mad at You!" She states as soon as she said it she felt a little scared, because she was raised to believe you could never talk to God like that. But she stated almost immediately after saying that, she felt God answer her by saying "Well at least you're finally talking to me like I'm really here." Whoa! Then she said she blinked her eyes and it was the next morning and she was fully rested with absolutely no pain! She said she felt immediate conviction but it changed the way she prayed forever. Now my grandma is what you consider a life-long Christian, accepted Jesus and has been devout most of her life. But it wasn't until a moment of desperation that she realized her prayer life was lacking, that she hadn't been really expecting an answer back!
It got me thinking, how many prayers have I said where I really didn't expect anything? And if I didn't expect anything to happen, why did I pray in the first place? There have been plenty of times were I have earnestly prayed to God out of fear, but that can't be right way to go about things. Then I realized that true prayer needs love. My grandma was desperate and in pain yes, but she was also in love with God. Her prayer life might needed tweaking but this was the opportunity that God chose to do that. Psalms 17:6 (TPT) You will answer me, God; I know you always will, like you always do as you listen with love to my every prayer. Psalms 116:1 (TPT) I am passionately in love with God because He listens to me. He hears my prayers and answers them. God deeply desires to have a personal relationship with us, one fill with prayer and answers. He wants each of us to be in such good communication with Him that when He answers back we aren't surprised but expecting it!
Now grandma's story did go on to mention the whole woke up refreshed and no pain part. She says she never remembers falling asleep, only hearing God's answer and it was suddenly the next day. I don't know that she ever had problems with cysts again because that wasn't the focal point of her story. The focus was that she heard God answer her prayer. Her entire emphasis was on the fact that God wanted to talk to her and once she realized that her relationship with God became much deeper. It has changed her way of viewing prayer forever. As I'm slowly growing in faith, I'm realizing more and more that God really does want to speak with me, even though many times I feel I'm unworthy of it. I try to remind myself daily, that God doesn't use the qualified but the willing.
It got me thinking, how many prayers have I said where I really didn't expect anything? And if I didn't expect anything to happen, why did I pray in the first place? There have been plenty of times were I have earnestly prayed to God out of fear, but that can't be right way to go about things. Then I realized that true prayer needs love. My grandma was desperate and in pain yes, but she was also in love with God. Her prayer life might needed tweaking but this was the opportunity that God chose to do that. Psalms 17:6 (TPT) You will answer me, God; I know you always will, like you always do as you listen with love to my every prayer. Psalms 116:1 (TPT) I am passionately in love with God because He listens to me. He hears my prayers and answers them. God deeply desires to have a personal relationship with us, one fill with prayer and answers. He wants each of us to be in such good communication with Him that when He answers back we aren't surprised but expecting it!
Now grandma's story did go on to mention the whole woke up refreshed and no pain part. She says she never remembers falling asleep, only hearing God's answer and it was suddenly the next day. I don't know that she ever had problems with cysts again because that wasn't the focal point of her story. The focus was that she heard God answer her prayer. Her entire emphasis was on the fact that God wanted to talk to her and once she realized that her relationship with God became much deeper. It has changed her way of viewing prayer forever. As I'm slowly growing in faith, I'm realizing more and more that God really does want to speak with me, even though many times I feel I'm unworthy of it. I try to remind myself daily, that God doesn't use the qualified but the willing.
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