Roots and vines

   His light broke through the darkness and He led us out in freedom from death's dark shadow and snapped every one of our chains!

Psalms 107:14 (TPT)

Vines are beautiful plants. Well most of them are, others are destructive, aggressive, and in some cases, poisonous. Sin roots are all three wrapped in one evil vine that longs to choke the spiritual life out of us. Many times what it starts out as isn't the only thing it becomes, as it grows, more tendrils of other sins begin to grow too.
   So often these seeds are planted early in childhood before we even can consciously grasp what is happening. One of my earliest memories is of being taunted by kids in my Sunday school class. They danced around me while saying "Heather doesn't have a daddy" over and over. Two things happened that day, the small seedling of hate was planted in me; I also realized that church wasn't a safe place. If church wasn't safe then I believed no place could be. I nurtured that hate seed until it ruled my life; it became my closest and oldest friend. Tendrils of rebellion, anger, distrust, and others grew rapidly. I wrapped myself in the idea that only I could keep me safe, "trust no one" was my internal motto.
   Then I got saved and for some silly reason I thought that meant all those roots were gone. How silly of me! I had let those vines grow for almost 30 years, they weren't leaving without some hard work. Destroying physical vines requires killing the entire root system or it just grows back, popping up in different areas and creating new root systems. Spiritual vines and roots operate on the same manner except instead of being in the back yard and climbing walls, they are wrapping our hearts and shooting vines out at others. Getting rid of them requires allowing God access to that seedling, that initial hurt, rejection, pain, it can be a host of things. It requires letting the Holy Spirit sift through your past, maybe present and when He shows you where that seed is, not looking away. But this time you aren't looking at it alone, He is there holding you, hearing your pain then and now. And when you're ready God grabs that seed and exposes it for the lie it is.
   For almost a week I had been walking around with this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. The Holy Spirit had shown me where my roots were stemming from and I was reluctant to let go of my hatred. I was actually terrified of what I would be if it didn't have it anymore! Finally I couldn't take the depressive agitated feelings anymore and I reached out for some prayer help. I kept praying over and over, "God I don't want this hatred anymore, but I just don't know how to get rid of it." I suddenly flashed back to that moment in Sunday school, and God said, "This lost little girl is no more, I am your Father, you're my daughter, there is no truth in this." For the first time since I could remember, I could see that memory and had no stirring of hate or anger! I just felt an overwhelming knowledge of who my Father is and the feeling of utter acceptance by Him that washed away any pain from those roots. Would you rather live with a vine stifling you or do you want to be free from that vine, the past pain that keeps choking out your present happiness? When the Master Gardner gently approaches you with arms ready to comfort while killing the lie seed placed in your heart; let Him take it.